Go

Work today was pretty boring. I wrote up some stuff, but generally had time to do a little browsing of the internet in ways that were only vaguely work related (looking at the political system of Namibia, for example - and by the way, it's pretty good). As I progressed through various websites, I actually got into certain non-governmental organizations (NGOs) set up in other countries, like one calling for human rights in Zimbabwe, for example. As I looked into opportunities for what these organizations did, or even just American partnerships with various organizations to teach English in Ghana, Kenya, Uganda, etc., I was filled with this almost overpowering urge to just go to these places. Help out poor people, work for political activist groups, teach math to 7 year olds, somethings, anything, to go somewhere way, way out there for a while. For a time, a few minutes, everything seemed so perfectly crystal clear. I was gone. There was no question if, it was only when.

Then, of course, life intervenes. I came home from work, at some delivery chinese food, helped somebody move a TV around, went and hung out with some people and watched half of Casino Royal, got tired, came home... and here I am. Africa now seems worlds away.

I wonder how much our lives in the United States insulates us from that desire to make a difference in the world. I think a lot of people our age are looking for meaning in something (when they're not just angry they're bored), and a lot (to sound like your parents) chose really meaningless ways of blowing off steam just to... well... I don't know why, exactly. Because we can, I guess. From 3 weeks spent volunteering in poor, rural Nicaragua during high school, I have a very, very limited sense that there's a world out there that's not the United States; where everything isn't as good as we all have it here. Not to quote spider man or be narcissistic, but I've, at times, questioned why I was given this intelligence, drive, and other amiable qualities (like having a profound desire to do something worthwhile with my life) instead of the millions, if not billions, that live on less than $1.25 a day. Surely it's to make some sort of small difference, somehow. That desire to make a difference is, in some ways, one of my most profound hopes for my life.

So after this brief little bit of reflection, I haven't determined if I'm going to be in Africa, New Jersey, Missouri, or somewhere else next summer. I can honestly say I really don't know. We're all reaching the points in our lives where, soon, we'll have the chance to chose exactly how we spend our time, where we go, where we live, and what impact we make. In all seriousness, this is something that we should all consider with the greatest of importance. Before long, this is going to be our world, to make of it what we will. I don't know where I, or any of the rest of us, are going to end up, but I hope in some small way we find a way to matter. If any of you ever feel similarly moved to go run off somewhere, know that, again in all seriousness, I'd love to have you along. We should talk.